People put boundaries on what seems like everything! They don't have an endless mind like SOME PEOPLE do. FANTASY ISN'T REALITY. If people like some stupid anime like ONE PUNCH MAN, then why can't I have a character who has a GOD DAMN INTELLIGENT FLYING SWORD!?!?! IT'S PASSED DOWN! IT'S BACKGROUND LISTED!! I'm trying to find happiness in absolutely EVERYTHING, yet REAL LIFE CUTS ME OFF, EVERY FUCKING TIME! I AM SO SICK OF IT! I'm sick of having to hit a brick wall, getting hurt by invisible thorns and other people swatting at me with WOMD's. I feel every cut. I feel every word slam into my gut. My wall... I try to keep it up but it fails me... I'm not strong emotionally, physically or mentally unless it comes to what I believe in. I just ask for small bits of happiness... I never ask for the whole. But people ruin it. They put straight lines on everything. They call me selfish, they call me a brat- but I see a bigger picture. You're just ruining me, molding me to your bullshit failing society. WELL, NEWSFLASH- IT'S MADE OF FUCKING LIES!!! "It'll be better when you grow up." more like, "DON'T WORRY, YOU'LL HURT WORSE WHEN YOU GET OLDER!"
It kills me...
And in the midst of this, I'm aging; the time on Mother's insurance is running out.
I'm at a dead-end part-time job.
I can't lift more than 5 lbs, and have to do it carefully and slowly because of WHAT HAPPENED TO MY BACK AT WORK!
The song i'm listening to on repeat is SKIPPING.
I'm probably killing my hearing with this being so loud.
I'm ignoring a friend because he bugs me LITERALLY everyday and keeps asking for fucking nudes!
I'M GOING TO LOOSE MY MIND!
I'm just not fucking fast enough for fast food, my body doesn't move like that.
My nerves are becoming more and more wrecked.
My hands are shaking as I write this.
I have Anxiety, PTSD, Depression; i'm an Emphatic person, Introvert, quiet, thoughtful, looks at the big picture.
I am fucking worthless in societies eyes.
I thought i'd like games like Pathfinder and D&D but I keep forgetting people can't be cool anymore. Why can't these games be like roleplay on the web? If you think about it, there's endless possibilities and yet we waste time with shitty dungeoneering and the likes.
I'm tired of being told, "You can't because the rules say." I respect reality laws, OK? That's fucking fine. But in an infinite enigma of a GAME, or ANIME. You should only have the boundaries as far as- You cannot godmod- OH WAIT! GUESS WHO DIDN'T LISTEN!!! anime. But i'm totally done with OPM; even it's short hand says OP. Overpowered.
I'm done trying to make friends, and play your stupid little ruled games.
And I know reality is sick of me too, that's why it never gives up on hitting me in the gut. Throwing rapid, invisible punches that come out of nowhere and ram me to the point i'm coughing out my sanity and gaining stress points.
